5 Student Fears in Maastricht

The mysterious city of Maastricht can be a veritable phobia for the faint hearted student. Here are few fears from Ievgen.

  1. Transportation. If you are a student coming from abroad, be prepared to struggle for your means of transportation. Usually, this problem is solved by purchasing an old two-wheeled piece of junk, which is quite dangerous to ride. But be careful: even the oldest bikes may be stolen by greedy natives. They are wandering around the centre all day smiling to pedestrians, and when the expected moment of a vacant bike comes, they turn into fabulous monsters, and tear the lock. Without any doubts, the city administration acts in collusion with them by proposing bus fare for € 2. Also in existence are these so called OV-chipcaards with an extremely tricky check-in-and-out system: locals attack you at the doors and do not let to check out. In this case, you pay € 4.
  2.  Weather. Thesesins of indigenous barbarians are definitely noticed by the God, who starts every second morning by showering the city. Also, the longer you stay in this damned town, the higher the likelihood of riding your rusty rubbish to classes in the torrential rain. It is a distressing and inexplicable phenomenon: you look out of the window, and the streets are dry, you go out, and the waterfall begins. Be aware that the series of sunny days is just an inevitable consequence of trying the local weed. That is to say, more than 2 days without rain can exist only in your head.
  3. Music. Plenty of very small pubs and clubs open their doors for naive wanderers every night. They lure you inside with shiny signs and cheap prices. Such places know a reliable method to rip off as many people as possible in the shortest amount of time. Once you go inside and order a drink, the discouraging cacophony starts. It fills the space around you with loud incomprehensible sounds somewhere between folk and pop. Needless to say, you cannot talk to people, and neither can you dance. As expected, you pay for the drink and leave soon after arriving, allowing a new group of the naive to enter these 30 m2.
  4. Library. It is a sacred place for all students with their trash bikes. Any day, there is an enormous pile of this questionable transport at the entrance. If you manage to park in the heap, you may enter this shrine through the magic moving-not-moving doors. The crowd is constantly going up and downstairs, printing and scanning millions of documents, and chatting, and chatting, and chatting. Your only option is to join this chaotic movement performing voodoo rituals.
  5. Medicine faculty. The majority of students know that this mysterious faculty exists, but they have never seen it. The locals have never visited this place either – their days are mostly occupied with bike stealing activities. It is somewhere in a wood outside the city. Similar to the centaur dwelling from that tale about the short sighted boy with a wooden stick and a lightning tattoo. Rumors spread that the faculty even has its own train station. The med fellows are turned into zombies, and then sent by train to graze cattle and level valleys all around the country. Probably.

    For information on student ‘diseases’ go to: https://maastrichtdiplomat.wordpress.com/2014/02/10/student-diseases-maastricht/

Ievgen Bilyk

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